alien and sedition...

I would say their intent is generally one of curiousity rather than malevolence. In this regard, they are rather more like tourists than missionaries.

In fact, I found their craft to be something like a cruise ship. The appointments were luxurious and comfortable, seemingly designed for pleasure, amusement, and worldy gratifications. The mood of the passengers reflected this purpose: light-hearted, mildly expectant, a blend of ennui and buoyance.

So they came, in their own way like the many white travellers we now see passing through Africa. On safari, seeking the primitive and exotic, perhaps a bit of danger. And even -- if they should get so lucky -- a chance encounter with Forbidden Love! Maybe they are even promised this in their brochures.

Anyway, the drugs they administered at my abduction left me awake and conscious, yet quite incapable of resisting their attentions. Naturally, I suppose, given their itinerary, the "ladies" among them took an especially keen interest in my genitalia. Of course I would be lying if I claimed such curiosities were not mutual.

I cannot now recount the exploitation, degradation, and shameful humiliations that ensued. Yet, after it was all over, after I was used up, exhausted, depleted, and spit out, my enduring sorrow is that they did not take me with them! I would have done anything to go with them. Anything to go to their world, to escape from this one.

Now I live in agony, the agony of an exile, of one not being "home". Any bright light in the sky stabs at my heart and stabs at my head. I pray nightly for their return, for the necessary documents, for my salvation.

I do have hope. Several of them have my email address and have promised to keep in touch. Any day now.

Lomé, Togo, July 2008.

Rolleiflex SL66, Fomapan 200 (with damage).